ahhh the past...its funny when you think of it. back then, in order to court a girl, the guy would have to do everything from courting the family, the parents and all that. during my parents time, well thats how it was.
times change. when i was in highschool, guys would still court the girl but not go through the family anymore. things were easier because of cell phones telephones and internet. yeah internet was still at 28kbps.
then i shifted to brent international school and daym!!! i saw a whole new world! a new fantastic place to be! ok i'll stop lol. but yeah since i entered brent, i saw a different world. i was mixed together with different nationalities and noticed that we filipino's are one of the few that follow certain courtship rules. i got my second girlfriend just like that. no courtship, no nothing. we were sitting in the classroom and just admitted that we liked each other. then it was understood already.
i know this isnt really making much sense cos its pretty jumbled up, but i guess what i mean to say here is that times change and also, not everything is the same when it comes to relationships.
hell! my parents wonder at times how us kids go along with life and relationships. they try to teach us their ways and we tell them that times have changed. i still prefer courting cos that way i get to know the girl more but times have changed a lot. and things will continue to change with every generation.
Sunday, April 6, 2008
Sunday, March 30, 2008
What is Home without Mother?
Unlike other nationalities, the Filipino family almost always stays together. We are affectionate and passionate at the same time. When someone reaches 18 years old or something to that number, you are considered an adult and are most of the time expected to be independent. When a foreigner reaches this age, he or she normally moves out of the house and begins his or her life.
Filipino families however, stick together. I am in one of those families. I am 24 years old, still in school, still living at home and am proud to say that i love being at home. I love my parents and my brother and sister.
In a normal Filipino family, it may seem that the father is the head of the family and controls everything; but in truth, the mother controls the family. Children often run to mom when there is trouble, they run to mom for advice and mom takes care of everything.
Remembering an experience from back across the years, i remember when i failed 1st year highschool after the countless promises of teachers that i would make it but didn’t anyway, mom came to me and hugged me. Then as we were walking out of school, one of the higher ranked teachers who also happened to be my adviser and counsellor in school went up to us and said “congratulations Mrs. Dueñas, i heard that Martin did very well!”. I will never forget that day, not only did he say those lines i will never forget the look in my mother’s face, the eyes that stared at him as if boring holes into his very soul made him realize his grave mistake. And just like that he looked away and left. The aura that my mom portrayed was both beautiful and ferocious and is indescribable. Magnificence! My mother has that and will always have that!
Filipino families however, stick together. I am in one of those families. I am 24 years old, still in school, still living at home and am proud to say that i love being at home. I love my parents and my brother and sister.
In a normal Filipino family, it may seem that the father is the head of the family and controls everything; but in truth, the mother controls the family. Children often run to mom when there is trouble, they run to mom for advice and mom takes care of everything.
Remembering an experience from back across the years, i remember when i failed 1st year highschool after the countless promises of teachers that i would make it but didn’t anyway, mom came to me and hugged me. Then as we were walking out of school, one of the higher ranked teachers who also happened to be my adviser and counsellor in school went up to us and said “congratulations Mrs. Dueñas, i heard that Martin did very well!”. I will never forget that day, not only did he say those lines i will never forget the look in my mother’s face, the eyes that stared at him as if boring holes into his very soul made him realize his grave mistake. And just like that he looked away and left. The aura that my mom portrayed was both beautiful and ferocious and is indescribable. Magnificence! My mother has that and will always have that!
Don't Give Up
Life goes on for people no matter what. So many people especially teenagers who experiences their first break up go into so much despair. However in the story Love in the Cornhusks, Tinay goes on with life by getting married and living on even after her lover disappeared without notice. She moves on as if nothing had happened until that faithful day wherein she receives a letter from Amado and his reasons for leaving so quickly, she lets down her guard in the corn husks and her thoughts begin to drift. We are like her in a way. If something like this happens, most of the time we would fall into a trance and begin to reminisce of the past.
When the snake that approaches her baby appears, she gets her guard back up and realizes that she has more important things in life to do than reminisce of a lover who left her in the dark.
The snake in this story will come; the baby does not necessarily need to be a real baby but perhaps something that would wake us up from what we were doing wrong. However, whenever we fall down whether it is love or something else, we should never give up. Life should go on.
Now, in the story The Choral, love is blind. Yes that line is cliché however it is true. You see, Filipino’s are not exactly the richest people in the world and we tend to fall for people who have money. This is what I have experienced personally and what I have seen by research and through other points of view. Most Filipinas who grew up not so well off, have odd jobs, tend to fall for the foreigners and other rich folk who adore them so much. Filipinas are often branded as exotic women to foreigners. Take a look at the real world and ask yourself, where do these men pick up such “exotic” women? Where else of course? Bars, clubs, services, public beaches and the like.
Filipinas and Filipinos alike, when we fall in love or go into a relationship, we are known to be faithful until the end. In short, when we find a mate, we will try and stay with him or her till the end. In the story The Choral, Pilar does something of the similar. She is with a rich man who adores her and loves her but she stumbles upon a man in her who came from a similar background and realizes that her heart needs someone like him. However, she continues to go on with her life of riches and stability rather than breaking everything up and going for a life of happiness. It is sad but this really happens in life.
When the snake that approaches her baby appears, she gets her guard back up and realizes that she has more important things in life to do than reminisce of a lover who left her in the dark.
The snake in this story will come; the baby does not necessarily need to be a real baby but perhaps something that would wake us up from what we were doing wrong. However, whenever we fall down whether it is love or something else, we should never give up. Life should go on.
Now, in the story The Choral, love is blind. Yes that line is cliché however it is true. You see, Filipino’s are not exactly the richest people in the world and we tend to fall for people who have money. This is what I have experienced personally and what I have seen by research and through other points of view. Most Filipinas who grew up not so well off, have odd jobs, tend to fall for the foreigners and other rich folk who adore them so much. Filipinas are often branded as exotic women to foreigners. Take a look at the real world and ask yourself, where do these men pick up such “exotic” women? Where else of course? Bars, clubs, services, public beaches and the like.
Filipinas and Filipinos alike, when we fall in love or go into a relationship, we are known to be faithful until the end. In short, when we find a mate, we will try and stay with him or her till the end. In the story The Choral, Pilar does something of the similar. She is with a rich man who adores her and loves her but she stumbles upon a man in her who came from a similar background and realizes that her heart needs someone like him. However, she continues to go on with her life of riches and stability rather than breaking everything up and going for a life of happiness. It is sad but this really happens in life.
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Romatic views Filipino Style
Filipino's in general think of love a lot. we are a romantic people. most of us view love relationships as a romantic and permanent thing. men often have to give their best and court a woman. courting is sort of like a stage wherein a man woos his lover with sweet nothings. its a slow and sweet proccess. this will also show the woman how much the man loves her.
sex on the other hand can be thought of in at least two different ways. one way of thinking is romantic sex. once again, romanticism is in the air. sex is an art with which the lovers express their passion and feelings for each other. the second view is on the malicious side. here, a man or woman fantasizes over their mate thinking of erotic desires and other malicious thoughts. there is no love in this view. if there is love it is only "love" and not real.
now in the story bread of salt, the fourteen year old character thought he was in love with Aida. as often as it is when one reaches the age of puberty, many hormones go crazy inside ones body and can often lead you into thinking you are in love with soemone but are really just either obssessed or infatuated. i named this character juan as he had no name and his only identification would be the letter I in the form of a narrative. he would often day dream about Aida and being with her, courting her and also wanted to by her a brooch. all of this symbolizes the filipino way fo courting. wanting to buy expensive things just to please a woman. then after what seems like forever, he is pushed back into reality, something happens and he realizes that he is not in love with the girl anymore. he was infatuated with her presense and also realizes the fourteen is much too young to be thinking about things like this. he still has a long way to go and should take life step by step.
as for the story summer solstice, what stuck in my mind was more of the intense passion and control shown in here. in this story, there is some sex but more of the control shown by the man over the woman. here, the women are slaves to a man. slaves in a way that she fears her husband and obeys his every whim. but when a new influence arrives (european chit chat), things change and the woman realizes that she should not be afraid of the man. man will not survive with her because men adore her. so she takes control and instead of obeying her lovers whim, she makes him beg for her and please her (shown as the husband kissing her feet).
in modern filipino times such as now, women have realized that men are in a way weak when it comes to falling for them. although the art of courtship has diminished due to external influences, women still play "hard to get" at times and they know they have a power over men in which the men will "purr and kiss their feet".
sex on the other hand can be thought of in at least two different ways. one way of thinking is romantic sex. once again, romanticism is in the air. sex is an art with which the lovers express their passion and feelings for each other. the second view is on the malicious side. here, a man or woman fantasizes over their mate thinking of erotic desires and other malicious thoughts. there is no love in this view. if there is love it is only "love" and not real.
now in the story bread of salt, the fourteen year old character thought he was in love with Aida. as often as it is when one reaches the age of puberty, many hormones go crazy inside ones body and can often lead you into thinking you are in love with soemone but are really just either obssessed or infatuated. i named this character juan as he had no name and his only identification would be the letter I in the form of a narrative. he would often day dream about Aida and being with her, courting her and also wanted to by her a brooch. all of this symbolizes the filipino way fo courting. wanting to buy expensive things just to please a woman. then after what seems like forever, he is pushed back into reality, something happens and he realizes that he is not in love with the girl anymore. he was infatuated with her presense and also realizes the fourteen is much too young to be thinking about things like this. he still has a long way to go and should take life step by step.
as for the story summer solstice, what stuck in my mind was more of the intense passion and control shown in here. in this story, there is some sex but more of the control shown by the man over the woman. here, the women are slaves to a man. slaves in a way that she fears her husband and obeys his every whim. but when a new influence arrives (european chit chat), things change and the woman realizes that she should not be afraid of the man. man will not survive with her because men adore her. so she takes control and instead of obeying her lovers whim, she makes him beg for her and please her (shown as the husband kissing her feet).
in modern filipino times such as now, women have realized that men are in a way weak when it comes to falling for them. although the art of courtship has diminished due to external influences, women still play "hard to get" at times and they know they have a power over men in which the men will "purr and kiss their feet".
Monday, January 14, 2008
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